Have you ever asked a question concerning a lesson on Sunday only to be greeted with deafening silence?  You ask the question again and even prompt a word or two of the desired answer to elicit some kind of signal that someone is listening.  Studies show that the upcoming generations are severely lacking in critical thinking skills.  (good read here) You’ve probably felt it by the crickets that are chirping back at you when you ask a question that requires kids to think.

So what’s a leader to do?

Ask better questions

Open ended questions are the most difficult time. Traditional testing in academics is designed for the student to regurgitate information back to the instructor.  Say the right thing or write the correct answer and viola, you get an “A”.  Open ended questions are left to interpretation.  ”What would you have done if you were Daniel?”  ”What do you think Peter was thinking when he stepped out of the boat?”  ”What would you do if someone bullied your friend at school?”

Don’t spoon feed answers

Until a child owns the answer, it doesn’t really matter what they say.  I know many Christians who can recite scripture after scripture but their life is a mess because it hasn’t affected their heart.  Allow kids to wrestle with the “right” answers and don’t spoon feed them the “you should” version that would pop up on a multiple choice exam. (Oh, and be ok with any silence that can happen while kids are thinking!)

Challenge kids to problem solve

Especially older elementary kids are ready to come up with their own service project.  They need supervision and guidance but they don’t need to be told what to do.  Give them a problem and let them think of some ways to make a difference.  You might be really surprised with how ready they are to rise to the occasion.

Teach parents how to do the same

Can you post a “tuck in” question for parents on your Facebook ministry page?  How about a good conversation starter for around the dinner table?  Your role isn’t to store up all the great questions for Sunday — encourage your parents to continue the conversations (or start new ones) at home!

There is a GREAT Ted talk on how to raise Entrepreneurs.  I encourage you to watch it.  Because the truth of the matter is that we can also raise social entrepreneurs.  I’m beginning to wonder if maybe it’s not that youth feel completely entitled to opportunity — maybe they have an abundance of frustration because we are spoon feeding when, in reality, they are ready to drive ministry instead of regurgitate the right answer.

What do you think?  What else can we do to be a part of the solution and not perpetuate the problem?

“You are going to have to convince me why I should give you my child for an hour every week?”

Believe it or not, that is just the question one parent asked their children’s pastor.  And you know what….it’s a question that we should all be prepared to answer. Before you break into a cold sweat, here are some filters to help you think through a great answer.

The Value of Community

Kids are not only media-driven, they are media saturated.  All of this “texting instead of talking” can have an adverse affect on interpersonal skills.  Friends influence our choices and character.  My son’s elementary school has seven 5th grade classes.  He doesn’t even know all the kids in his grade level now — how in the world will he really know all of his peers in High School?  How will your ministry stay relationally small in a super-sized, digital world?

The Role of Parents

We actually want parents to ask questions like the one above and take an interest in knowing where their child is at spiritually.  How are you making it easy for parents to continue the dialogue at home?  Unrealistic expectations for parents to lead a family devotional every night is setting them up for failure.  Believe in the potential for every parent to do something….not necessarily everything.  Encourage them to continue the dialogue at home.

The Sovereignty of God

When life takes a downward turn, will kids (and parents) understand that there is a really big God they can trust — no matter what?  Are you presenting God’s truth in such a way that kids will be able to apply it to their everyday lives? The way we communicate Biblical truth and encourage kids to wrestle with questions that are not answered with a simple “yes or no” is a huge issue for our ministries.

Intentional Leaders

Consistency is key with volunteers.  Weekly commitments, intentional training, constant affirmation.  How are you developing the voice that will speak into the lives of kids?

While these are just 4 filters to think through, I firmly believe in the 5 Things Every Kids needs as a great roadmap to structure children’s ministry around.  And now the pressure is on for you – Why should parents give you their kids for an hour every week?

Child Survival Program Promoter

During my trip to Ecuador with Compassion International, I had the opportunity to learn about the Child Survival Program.  This initiative is one of the newer programs of Compassion but is proving to strengthen the local church, save lives and offer the hope of Jesus Christ to those in abject poverty…and I’m looking for 105 compassionate people who will commit to $20 / month to fund a CSP project in Ecuador.

Tragically, one out of 11 children will die before the age of five — most from preventable causes.  When Compassion began to look at this issue, they understood  that moms in abject poverty do not have access to healthcare, parenting classes, and many of them are literally living in very hopeless situations.  Additionally, more than 40% of the mortality rate happens within the first month of life.

The Solution?  CSP — Child Survival Program.  In areas where there is a CSP, the mortality rate goes from 24/1,000 to a dramatic reduction of 1/2,000.  There are 4 main ingredients that go into this successful prescription for saving the lives of the next generation.

The Local Church.

Compassion International works with local churches in abject poverty areas to bring the hope of Jesus Christ, education, healthcare, and community to mothers and their babies in the most critical of circumstances.

You will never see a Compassion International sign hanging on the local church.  Compassion empowers local churches who best understand the unique issues facing their community.  The passion and commitment that local communities have to take care of each other is unparalleled.

Education.

Mothers are given access to healthcare, immunizations and education on proper nutrition.  The  CSP program focuses on equipping mothers to help their child develop in four key areas:  physically, mentally, emotionally and spiritually.  Children who graduate from the CSP program are often developmentally ahead of their peers and excel further in primary education.

One to One Relationships.

Each local church has a team of CSP “Promoters” who work with mothers throughout their pregnancy and through the first 3 years of the baby’s life.

These volunteers are vital to the success of the program.  They work 6 days a week and visit every mother and baby for up to an hour once a week.  Home visits are the highlight of the week for new moms who often feel overwhelmed and worried about the condition of their child.

While the goal of the CSP is to increase the survival rate for babies, the incredible side effect is a deep friendship between mom and Promoter.  Promoters enter into a world of compassion because they see the problems and the longings of the mothers….they feel what the mothers feel.  The mothers feel that the Promoters are a friend, sister and counselor.

Elevate Self Worth in Abject Circumstances

Mothers who are a part of the CSP program also attend weekly skill workshops at the local church that help them discover new talents that can even be taken into the marketplace to earn income for their family.  These workshops, more importantly, help build self esteem in the mothers who often feel completely worthless and help them find purpose for the talents God has given each one of them.

If you feel like the problem of poverty is too big for you to impact, let me encourage you…. You can have an enormous impact — and save lives — by supporting strategic programs like Compassion’s CSP.

Share your thoughts below.  Do you struggle with how to impact poverty?  I’m giving away one of my favorite books by Dr. Wes Stafford, “Too Small to Ignore” to all those who join in the discussion by posting a comment through February 14.  Show a little more than love this Valentine’s Day, show Compassion…..

Our Group, Nancy's family and her CSP Promoter

How do you encourage your child’s giftedness to make a real impact in the world?  Need a little inspiration to help you move beyond telling your child, “good job”?

Check out this sweet book called Gregory’s Paper Airplane by Benjamin Sherman….(And guess how old the author is? If I did the math right in the bio, he’s 8 years old!)

After noticing Ben’s giftedness for writing, his mom and dad prayed about how they could encourage him in his passion.  I love that their answer was not only to publish his work, but to give back in the process.  A portion of the proceeds of this book go to benefit Agape International Missions and the International Justice Mission.

Don’t you just love how this invites Benjamin into the bigger story God is telling?  I do!

“Our lives find meaning as we view ourselves as participants in God’s unfolding story.” (Deep Justice in a Broken World, Chap Clark & Kara Powell)

Gregory’s Paper Airplane serves as a great reminder that it is never too early to show our children how they are gifted for a great purpose that will bring glory and honor to God and justice to the world.

What would be on your “Top 10″ list for reasons why you should serve in Children’s Ministry?  This was a fun exercise that my husband and I played with over lunch one day.  So without further delay — here are the Top 10 why we think you should serve in Children’s Ministry:

10. You never have to make decision on what to wear on Sunday.

9.  Unlimited coffee (don’t worry — for you, not the kids!)

8.  Acting like a kid is encouraged — so you will definitely fit in….!

7.  HIGH FIVES for everyone!

6.  You can channel your inner boy band and sing as loud as you want.

5.  You can hype them up and give em back to their parents.

4.  Kids can (and will) teach you how to use your iPhone.

3.  Walking among kids makes you feel like you are Dirk Nowitzki.

2.  You will speak God’s love to a captive audience (who wants to hear it…!)

1. You’ll be a part of God’s bigger story to the next generation.

Recently I counseled a friend of mine during a time of transition in Children’s Ministry.  She was wanting to breathe new life into the program and was starting from scratch, so to speak.

After talking through a vision for what the next year could look like, she came up with a plan to put things in motion.

And she did a very smart thing.

In fact, this was such an obviously brilliant idea that I couldn’t believe that it hadn’t smacked me upside the head before I had watched her in action.

She recruited couples.

She spoke face to face with husbands and wives who could be a part of a change to better connect the next generation to the story God is telling.  And then she spread the word about the amazing couples who were joining her in this mission.

And others noticed.

And got excited.

Now, I know there is never the cliche ending of “and they all lived happily ever after” when it comes to recruiting and training volunteers.  But this very strategic move to invite families to a bigger story created a lot of momentum — fast.

And it got me thinking even more.

My husband and I have been serving together for years now.  And we cherish it!  When we first started volunteering in the preschool rooms together, I got to see a whole new side of my husband that I didn’t normally witness at home.

Another girlfriend of mine recently admitted that she sings in the church choir because her husband is so much fun to watch as he leads the group.  She sees him in his element and loves to be a part of something he loves so much (and is so good at!).

Couples may not have identical gifting — but inviting them to serve for a common purpose in tailored roles can bring great joy — not only to the kids they serve, but to the couples themselves.

Do you have any stories of couples serving together for a common mission?

I once had a business leader ask me, “How do you measure your effectiveness?”

Good question.

It’s so tempting to want to measure our effectiveness but often the factors are driven by the intrinsic motivation of others.

I think there are certain measurables that are very helpful in ministry.  But when measurables cross over into monitoring behavior, I think some sort of red light should go off.

I’m not easily frustrated by parents who elect not to complete resources that a church hands to them.  Because my ultimate measure of effectiveness will be associated to the level of belief I have in a parent’s ability to complete them.

I’m not interested in grading their homework — but more in how to encourage parents in the story that God is telling through them.

I don’t think faith is a linear process where you start at point A and arrive at point C by taking specific steps or memorizing certain scriptures.  It’s an individual journey and everyone’s destination is unique.

Sometimes I think the better question to ask is “How do you stay strategic?”   What are you doing to help lead parents to the next step — from where they are now to doing something more with and for their family?  Not every parent will move forward but that isn’t really the goal….is it?

What measurables seem to frustrate you in ministry?  Do you need a reminder to believe in the parents of your ministry?